MMR VACCINE

Thursday was an emotional day for many reasons. Friday marked the deadline for many faucets of the case I am working on as a contractor. I also met with my gyno for a post operative exam. Everything is healing nicely. He showed me pictures of my insides. We talked briefly about PCOS, taking Femara and Metformin. He thinks that taking Metformin would be beneficial even tho I do not have documented insulin resistance. This is over his head tho and I will need to talk to the endocrinlogist about actually getting a prescribtion. We talked briefly about Femara. Femara is a drug prescribed to breast cancer patients and post-menopausal women. It has recently been used to induce ovulation. It has less side effects of clomid. My doctor was willing to prescribe this even tho he has never prescribed it before, since we don't have insurance to use the RE.

Then he remembered that I needed the measles vaccine. BOO!!
Thus...I was poked with the measles mumps rubella vaccine. I was fully vaccinated as a child, but the MMR antibody wore off. When I went to the reproductive specialist in May she ordered a series of tests, one of which was to check for the MMR anti-body. Mine was negative!!!! A nurse in Everett administered the shot. She made me take ANOTHER negative pregnancy test. The needle poke didn't really hurt, but the vaccine itself stung very much.

Now my gyno wants me to wait 3 months before actively trying to get pregnant since the MMR is a live vaccine.

Flabbergasted

God is amazing...today things were stressful at the office and yet God gave me so much joy...and peace.

I am flabbergasted at how one moment the world comes crashing down around you, the tears fall, life hurts so much, you are picking up the pieces of your hearts shattered glass and in the next moment God allows your spirits to soar to the mountain tops. You never know what the next moment will bring tears or laughter...all you know is this moment. All you are guaranteed is this moment. Embrace this moment...

As to surgery recovery, today is one week since my surgery. My stomach has felt better the last two days. I can bend down without much pain. I lifted a 20 lb box today without much pain.

I received a message from my doctor today saying that I need to get re-vaccinated for Measles/Mumps/Rubella since my body no longer has the anti-body. After getting the shot we have to wait three months to try to conceive. My post operative appointment is on June 25. If I get the vaccine then I wouldn't be able to try to get pregnant until September 25. In the scheme of things three months is nothing, but it is another delay.

Jeremy is more focused on me getting a new job. I would like one too, but I'd also like some kids! (yesterday ;)

Joy in the land of crazy

Today God blessed me with much joy. I accomplished much at the contract job, but it was still a bit stressful. I am glad to be gaining more experience in my profession, and also for being able to pay the bills.

Even tho things are up in the air with my employment and fertility God has given me much joy.

This morning on the way to the office I prayed for God's discernment and peace. . . that I would know what to say and what not to say, what to do and what not to do. I was not perfect, but I did I left the office today, smiling. I even wanted to make Jeremy dinner, but he had already eaten by the time I got home.

I have Hope in Christ today. For today I know that I am loved, cared for. Today I am able to pay my bills. Today I have Hope that Christ will provide us children.

Still Recovering

I feel like a basketball game took place within my abdomen. I keep cramping. Today I went to the office to work on the contract case... I was so exhausted after two hours. Jeremy picked me up after four hours.

I think my pants were not helping so tomorrow I am going to wear a dress that does not catch at the waist.

P.C.O.S.

My name is Jessica...I have PCOS.

I feel like we are in a circle and I'm confessing some sort of addiction...when I'm really joining the unfortunate sisterhood of those women who have gone before me, who have and continue to live with PCOS.

Finally being diagnosed with this explains so much, the difficulty losing weight, the mood swings, lack of ovulation, increased testosterone levels etc...

We can't afford medical treatment right now, but we can afford prayer, and changes in lifestyle.

I ordered three books today to help me learn more about PCOS and change my exercise and eating habits accordingly. From what I have read on the internet the exercise part alone is what provides the most benefits.

The books I ordered are as follows

I hope these books will give me a better understanding of PCOS and empower me to make changes I can make now while we are waiting to be able to afford medical treatment. I don't have insulin resistance yet, but my blood sugar is on the high end of normal. Attempting the insulin resistance diet is def. not going to hurt anything. What is frustrating is these changes will take a while to have any affect and I want a baby now...make that yesterday :)

Also...as to the surgery...my tummy still hurts. I slept all day yesterday...literally...ALL DAY. I was planning on going into the office today (for contract work) but didn't because I was still exhausted. I didn't take any pain meds all day yesterday. I think tihs contributed to the exhaustion...so at 10am today I took a pain pill and walla not as tired and not as crampy. I have not slept since 10am and it is now 6pm. I have been sitting all day...but not snoring like yesterday. I have a day and a half of pain pills left. I plan on taking them the rest of today and tommorow. Jeremy is going to drive me to the office tommorow so I can get some work in on the case I helping on. Poor guy is going to pick me up at the end of the day too.

The good news and the bad news.

Yesterday I had a laparoscopy and hysteroscopy surgery. Luckily they only had to make a cut in my belly button so no new scars.

The good news is the doctor did not find any endometriosis, or fibroids...my tubes are clear.

Meaning our only diagnosed fertility issues are my lack of ovulation and hostile cervical fluid, which can be taken care of with fertility medication, IUI, and God's miraculous timing.

The bad news is the doctor did confirm I have polycystic ovaries...which means I do in fact have polyscystic ovarian syndrome.

The other bad news is we still don't know why I've been having so much pain.

Right now my tummy hurts. I'm taking lots of pain medication. I don't know how you ladies with c-sections have done this...I just have a little incision and I'm moaning and groaning. My tummy hurts!!!! My ovaries hurt! The gas they injected in me to seperate my organs for surgery hurts. I haven't taken a shower in two days... I can finally take one tonight!!!!

More about the Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome... (PCOS)

It is a gynetic dis-order if your mother or sister had it you likely have it...
Most women produce one healthy strong egg each cycle and release it at ovulation...women with polycystic ovarian syndrome produce alot of small puny eggs that never get big enough to ovulate...they turn into little cysts when ovulation does not occur creating more testostorene hindering future ovulation...a vicious cycle... it makes it difficult to lose weight, puts women who have it at an increased risk for diabetes, heart attack, infertility, miscarriage etc...

Some of the symptoms decrease with weight loss...but it is more difficult to lose weight with polycystic ovarian syndrome, and there is no gurantee the symptoms will decrease with weight loss. There are plenty of skinny women that have PCOS as well.

Whenever I get a job again Jeremy and I plan on pursuing IUI...or if a creative fundraising idea strikes us...we suddenly come into money etc... Since I need fertility medication a cycle of IUI for us costs $800. Pray that God provides a miracle baby or two or three for our family, and right now for healing for my owie tummy. Praise God that our fertility issues are small compared to many women, and for God's greater purpose in our life.